Remember the cliques in high school?

That group of exclusive cool people. Some were on the inside, others on the outside. I was usually on the outside.

Even if you were not in the cool group, you still had your own clique. Some called us outcasts. Those outside the cool clique had one question:

How do I become part of the cool cliques?

I thought once I got to college there would be no more cliques. I was as wrong as the guy who said, “No one will want to buy a laptop.”

Cliques are everywhere. School, church, work, professional life, community, and more.

Here are four tips for joining virtually any clique and become part of the “in” crowd.

1. Be cool and not irritating

Not as hard as some people think. Improve your likeability, conversation skills, and stop a few irritating habits. Only 30 minutes with the right techniques can do wonders. The secrets are in the Conversation Success System.

2. Build relationships with individuals who are in the click

This is very powerful method. As you seek to use techniques from the Conversation Success System you will build those relationships. You will soon be part of the clique.

3. Add value

Recently, I visited a chess club. These 5 strangers were part of the chess clique. After 10 chess moves I was accepted and part of the group? Why. I showed I am a very good chess player. I bring value to their group.

4. Be Patient

You usually can’t break into cliques overnight. It may take weeks or months. However, apply the above strategies and you’ll be able to break into virtually any clique.

One simple conversation technique will guarantee you have plenty of conversation topics in any conversation.

Thursday night was the highlight of our week. My wife and I hung out with another married couple. We are great friends and always have a blast.

Over chips & chocolate, we laughed, discussed, and deepened our friendship. There was never a dull moment. Partly because they have great conversation skills and partly because of the powerful conversation technique.

On the way to their house, my wife and I thought of 5 experiences we could share from our life and then about 5 questions to ask them. We were prepared. Whenever the conversation started to wain, we asked the question or brought up our experience.

It worked beautifully.

The conversation flowed smoothly and we strengthened our relationships.

I use this technique all the time. Worked great on dates when I was single. Makes me look and sound professional during business appointments.

Don’t go into conversation unprepared. Think up several questions and conversation topics. You can use the FORTH technique from the Conversation Success System.

Have a Great Weekend,

Austin Barnes

Just out of high school, I was involved in face-to-face sales. I quickly discovered a selling secret. Make conversation with the potential customer.

As I’ve covered in the Conversation Success System, using interest with questions is powerful.

There is one question I would use almost every time.

Not sure where I heard it from, but it I loved using it and customers enjoyed answering it.

How do you like to spend most of your time?

Most of the time people would share about their work and/or hobbies. Great fodder for more questions or to find a connection.

(Finding connections is essential to quickly connecting with people. See more info in the Conversation Success System.)

This is a better question than asking “What do you do?” A person may be embarrassed to mention they are unemployed, etc.

Stick with powerful question above and you’ll take your conversation skills to the next level.